As I laid in bed last night with my thoughts wondering again. Oh how did I get here and how could someone be so mean. I realized something that gave me such clarity. I am not going to go through life playing the victim. I am empowered and I can choose to go on with my life to victorious. Yes I am conceited much! But really I have 3 beautiful daughters who are the jewels in my life and whom I want to raise to know their value and worth is defined by God. I hope they do not to allow any man/woman to degrade them. So I thought about how God is the one who places value & worth in us and how I strive to see myself as God does. Here’s what I wrote to myself and my daughters but thought I’d share for other women.
All girls are precious valuable jewels. We are all created this way and yet each one is very different. The coarseness of our world helps to cut, shape and refine us into individual gems and stones. Sometimes events bring a cloudiness into our luster, but God always intended us to shine. I was not created to fear this harsh world but to embrace it and allow the events to refine me. True authentic diamonds will not crush under the pressures but shine even brighter. I want to be authentic and most of all I want to raise authentic children who will not shutter away from lives pressures. I want them to know who they are and have a confidence in the Lord and in theirselves. I want my daughters to know they are not alone and together we will get through anything. Smiling through our tears and allowing difficult times to help shape and mold us for the better. Mistakes truly are lessons when you stand up an own them. I am here not to punish them I am here to support them and help them shine their brightest. I don’t want to lock them away or say words that may devalue their spirits. What happens if you put your jewels away in a box and never take the time to polish them? Their shine is dulled, sometimes it takes a lot of work to polish them and maybe the precious metals tarnish. I want to raise my kids up with confidence in themselves and their abilities. I don’t want them to be fearful of me, but to know I am here to help them with their problems and mistakes. I want to help them make good choices and for that I need them to be able to talk to me about any and everything without fear. I also don’t want to outline every choice they make, but to allow them to take their own journeys and become a person that can think for themselves not just another blind follower with no heart or spirit of their own. I want them to be authentic not a fake that just is what the world tell them to be.
I have learned much about my failed marriage and believe me I tried to salvage it. I’ve read many books talked to many counselors, but the problem was I was alone in my pursuit to salvage the marriage. I’ve learned that the man you chose can certainly impact your ability to shine. Think of the man as the setting that you put the precious jewel in. Some are certainly more flattering than others and some just don’t work or become loose and the jewel just falls right out. Smack hitting the ground & lost forever. Men please realize if you have a precious jewel cherish it, polish it, don’t lock her away, but help glorify her beauty and protect her. In a great relationship both parties are giving 100% of themselves and their luster is so glorious. Everyone can see they shine. Not that all days are glorious but that all days you try to make the best of and your in it together. Building each other up not devaluing the other's worth by investing time to polish each other you will both shine so bright and stay forever beautiful.
To all you independent single ladies don’t forget to invest in yourself and certainly don’t settle for anyone who doesn’t see your worth. There is nothing wrong with letting your light shine and being happily in love with you. Matter a fact I think it is always best to fall in love with God and then love yourself before you attempt to love a man. Believe me and learn from my mistakes. Heartache hurts bad and the dynamics of a relationship can cause serious damage to one’s spirit and confidence. It’s taken me a long time to find my shine again. But after all life’s pressures I think to myself I’ve truly been authenticated. I haven't shattered beyond repair just needed some polishing. God Bless all of God’s precious jewels & I hope you find your shine.
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